My Star Wars Saga

Hey guys,

So here it is, as promised, my first non-movie review posting.  I can’t exactly say it isn’t movie-related given the title of the post.  But it is more movie licensing related.  Allow me to explain…

Last Christmas, my family gave me a Death Star popcorn popper for Christmas.   It was awesome as hell, but it didn’t work very well.  So, naturally I got in touch with the manufacturer.  I wrote them this:

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Hello Uncanny Brands,

I recently received a Death Star Popcorn Maker as a Christmas gift.  I’m a Star Wars nut so I welcome all gifts from a galaxy far far away.  As long as they work.  And I’m sad to say this popcorn maker does not work correctly.  At all.  It spits out tons of unpopped kernels.  Little bastards fly all over the kitchen counter… some of them pop after they’ve been expelled and if those late popping kernels land in the bowl first, the pop shoots popcorn all over, not only the counter, but the floor too.  It’s makes a huge mess and leaves roughly 20% of the kernels unpopped.  I want to love this product, but frankly, it kinda sucks.  Too bad.  I guess I’ll go back to popping popcorn in oil on the stove top.

 But what I’d really like to know is if I can somehow get a refund for this turkey.  It’s in perfect condition having only been used once.  As I mentioned, I received it as a gift so I do not have a receipt and I do not know where it was purchased.  Which is why i’m contacting you.

 Any info you can provide would be appreciated.

Thank you.

Cohan (Star Wars super-fan, popcorn enthusiast, sad Death Star Popcorn Maker owner)

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I didn’t really expect a response, but 24 hours later, I received this reply:
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Cohen- [sic]

Thanks for your email. And thanks for supporting our product. You review is greatly appreciated.

In general, most air-pop popcorn makers leave un-popped kernels. Its the one drawback of an air-pop machine versus a kettle machine that pops with oil. Your opinion is noted; however, Im surprised. This popcorn maker was our #1 selling SKU in 2017…with an extremely low return & defective rate.
Since you did not purchase the product directly from us I cant issue you a refund. What I would like to do — since you are a Star Wars nut — is send you some additional product in exchange for your honest review. Is that fair?
Please send me your address and I can send you some goodies.
Thanks Cohen [sic]
Uuncanny Brands [sic]
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My response to this email was, of course, something along the lines of, “HELL. YES.”  And then a couple months went by and I forgot all about the exchange, until one day I came home from work to find a very large box left outside my front door.  A package whose arrival was not something I was expecting.  I had no idea what it was.  When I brought it in and opened it up, I discovered this:

IMG-0828

Uncanny Brands had totally come through.  They had sent me Light Saber Salt & Pepper mills, a R2D2 toaster, a Stormtrooper toaster, a Stormtrooper waffle iron, and a Lightsaber Immersion Blender.  Holy shit.  I was shocked.  Of course, since they followed through and sent me all this schwag, I felt a certain responsibility to hold up my end of the deal.  So I did.  I used all the items and wrote reviews for each one.  See my follow up posts for reviews of each product.
c

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